The second sign of a community characterised by the Mindset of the Spirit is its ability to allow for a sense of complementarity as different people manifest Christ to each other in particular ways. If we look to the church in Colossi as an example, it is worth noting that this was probably the household of Philemon. So when Paul lists various pairs of relationships here, he is using the “household” code of the day but with the twist that the Spiritual Mindset brings to these relationships.
The first pair of relationships considered are those between husbands and wives. If Men are from Mars and women are from Venus, what difference does the Spiritual; Mindset make?
Col. 3:18 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
The thought that women should ever submit to men has become a modern anathema but it is worth noting that what Paul is calling for here is something distinct from notions of patriarchy – the key phrase is “as is fitting in the Lord.” As Paul describes in a very similar passage in Eph.5, what the wife is submitting to is the husbands efforts to love her as Christ loved the church, sacrificing his life for her godliness. It has nothing to do with competency and everything to do with being Christ-like as Paul wrote earlier:
Col. 3:12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.
So out of kindness and compassion, husbands are instructed to take initiative in their households for promoting the Mindset of the Spirit. Please note that has nothing to do with who does the most paid work or even who earns the most when they do. It has nothing to do with setting budgets, choosing fabrics or who holds the remote control for the telly, UNLESS any of these become an issue of godliness. In those circumstances a husband is expected to take the initiative in promoting the Spiritual Mindset and a wife, in humility and patience, is to submit to that initiative.
The next relational pairing that Paul addresses is between parents (fathers) and children. Here the Mindset of the Spirit sees that families need much more than “the world’s strictest parents or super-nannys” and if children are left free to express themselves they are mostly likely merely to perfect their selfishness.
Col. 3:20 Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. 21 Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.
Children must obey their parents because home is the first Sunday school. Likewise parents must guard their godliness to ensure that they don’t discourage their children with hypocrisy.
The last aspect of the household code is perhaps the trickiest insofar as to our modern ears it is difficult to think of slavery as anything other than the atrocities committed against Africans in the 18th and 19th centuries. Now that was by no means the most common experience of the first century slave, especially in a place like Colossi but even if it was, what Paul has to say is all the more radical:
Col. 3:22 Slaves, obey your earthly masters in everything; and do it, not only when their eye is on you and to curry their favour, but with sincerity of heart and reverence for the Lord. 23 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, 24 since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. 25 Those who do wrong will be repaid for their wrongs, and there is no favouritism. 4:1 Masters, provide your slaves with what is right and fair, because you know that you also have a Master in heaven.
To the slaves Paul gives both the exhortation to act with integrity as well as hope for those who may suffer injustice. Work as though it was for the Lord because you know that he will vindicate you ultimately. The master with the Spiritual Mindset will always recall that they have a greater overseer in heaven- the Lord Messiah Jesus. Loosely speaking this could apply to any workplace accord. Christian employees must work with integrity especially considering that they are not indentured slaves. It may even be worth considering whether our indebtedness to other institutions needs reconsidering to ensure that there is less stress on any relationship we might have with an employer. If we are living so far beyond the means that regular employment can meet - perhaps its time to reconsider. For employers to live with the Mindset of the Spirit, there should be no need for collective bargaining because you are always considering what the Lord Jesus deserves in terms of the way you treat those who work for you.
